The Converted...

I don't know what to make of this. But yesterday I went in for my chiropractor appointment (which-as usual-fixed my back for about 3 hours before it returned to being a mess of knots, spasms, and rock-like...things...up and down my trapezius). So my Dr. Mike, who's from Boston, starts in with his whole, "Oooh so howd the Yankees do the other day?" Hilarious. And I told him to back off because the stress is making my back situation worse, and he can't deliberately aggravate my condition because it's against the hypocratic oath.

Yeah, that's right, that's what I said.

AND THEN, he says, "I'm just messing around. Actually, I just converted. I bought a Yankee hat the other day. I'm a Yankee fan now."

!!!!!!

Ok, setting aside the whole "well he must not have been a true fan" argument for a second, this is just making my head spin. I can understand someone converting from being a Jets fan to a Giants fan, or arbitrarily becoming an Indians fan instead of a Pirates fan, or something. But this is like converting to Judiasm after to going to Catholic school your whole life.

How can you be raised one way and then all of a sudden just starting eating Kosher? (Well, actually my little sister did this when she dated a Jewish guy. And so whenever we went out to eat together, she always had to remind me, "Dont forget! Order the ranch on the side! AND make sure they don't bring it on the same plate!" I was very impressed with her devotion. No offense to the religion itself, but there isnt a man on God's green earth that could induce me to give up bacon, egg, and cheeses.)

Regardless. So there you have it. Dr. Mike is a Yankee fan. I have no idea why. My mom, of course, says, "Well I think he likes you and knows if he's a Yankee fan he'll have a better chance!" Spoken like a true mother trying to marry her daughter off to a doctor. She also knows my 3 rules. The 3 rules being the absolutely necessary, no questions, no exceptions parameters for any guy I date. And they sound simple, but trust me, finding someone with all 3 is a lot harder than it looks. As evidenced by the fact I've found all of 3, and 2 of them almost died from my cat (so I guess the 4th is "not allergic to Mariano Rivera."):
1. Makes me really laugh
2. Loves the Yankees and sports. Really loves them, as in feels an emotional connection to the game, and likes hearing all those B-side stories about the players. Just simply loves baseball. You get the idea.
3. At the end of the evening/hanging out/meeting him for first time, he has to say something to the effect of, "When will I see you again?" Yeah I dont know. Gets me every time, though.

So of course my mom is now like, "Well look at that he has all 3 now!" I don't think that counts, because doctors HAVE to say, 'When am I going to see you again?" So no dice there.

I trotted out my metaphor to my mom, telling her that I already have 162 dates lined up this spring. But I don't think she got it, as she said, "WITH WHO?"

You can understand why she'd be confused, though.

So moral of the story: Boston sucks.