The awesome, the good, the bad, and the ugly

The Awesome
They finally put the kit kats in a lower tier in the vendint machine at work. Now when they fall, they don't run the risk of snapping. And the tragedy is that I'm leaving in 2 weeks. See, this is a PERFECT example of a superior alternative to any one of the vinettes in the Alanis Morrisette song, Ironic. Of allll the ironic things in the world, she picked the most banal, inconsequential, and unpoetic. 10,000 spoons when all you need is knife?? It's not like that Twilight Zone when the dude breaks his glasses right as he's about to start reading all the books. That is heart-wrenching. The idea of someone with a surplus of spoons is not. Not to mention 99% of the issues Ironic pitches are not, in fact, by definition ironic. They're just welcome to the suck situations.

This is the type of stuff I think about when the yankees have day games, and I have nothing to do when I get home. That, and measuring the risk-reward ratio of plugging in old school Nintendo. The noise when mario goes down a pipe still gives me old-fashioned butterflies. But I worry about how I will feel about myself after the game is over. And I'm sitting in front of my tv with nothing but the Hills on DVR to distract me from the fact I'm 25 years old and still jerking a video game controller around maniacally.

I gotta go return some video tapes.

The Good:
The Hills is on tonight.

The Bad
The Yankees lost.

The Ugly
Fat people who wear flip flops
The following line in today's NY Post: "A-Rod didn't start due to a bruised left big toe."

The Worth Mentioning
Melky Cabrera
Aaron Guiel
Nick Green
Andy Philips

The Yankees buy their team. Read that sentence again.

Or consider that Aaron Guiel was dropped from the Kansas City Royals. And so the Yankees, driving around in their giant sheepdog van, pulled over to the side of the road, Torre screamed, "PICK HIM UP!" and then Guiel joined in a rousing rendition of MOCK! SI! ING! SI! BIRD! SI!

They're magic pinstripes. Yankees bought their team from the same guy who sold Jack his beanstalk beans.