An inspiration to us all

If franchise ownership doesn't work out this year, it's nice to know he can fall back on motivational speaking.

I don't know what's sadder. This outlash that I find-for whatever reason-incredibly disloyal, or the saccharine, embarassing marquee that still pains me to think about.

I can see why people hate Steinbrenner. I would be so livid if I was Torre right now. Yes, the Yanks are getting their asses kicked all around the east coast, but for Steinbrenner to publicly chastise his team...it's almost like when a boyfriend gets all hammered at a bar and starts making an ass of himself and gets overly jealous. So he starts telling some dude to stop hitting on his girlfriend. And then when the couple leaves, the girlfriend goes back to the dude and apologizes for her boyfriend's behavior. Whether the boyfriend/Yankees are right or wrong, you never divorce yourself from them. You're a team. I think when you're in a relationship, you have the other's back no matter what. I'm writing a story about this right now, so don't be suprised if I roll out this metaphor again...

Well, I could have used Steinbrenner's gems of inspiration yesterday when me and my beirut partner lost in the first round of the tournament. And in all fairness, it was completely my fault. Beforehand, I kept telling him, "alright, this is serious business, no screwing around. I mean it." And he was like, "Um okay well I've probably played in about 4 beirut games my whole life, so...I may disappoint you."

And then, of course, he hit all of the cups except one. And I just didn't come through. Fortunately he was like, "You're lucky Ive seen you play before, so I know this is just a bad day. Because otherwise, you know how much shit I should be giving you for talking such a big game..."

We did manage to walk out of the bar with a mini coors light football helmet he won in a raffle. And somehow I left with a Wilson football with all the team logos on it. Not sure how I ended up with that one though. I didn't win it in a raffle, and I didn't steal it or anything. I think maybe someone who won it didn't feel like holding it anymore, so he gave it to me? I have no idea. But now I have a nice football on my mantle next to my steinbrenner signed baseball, and my 1930's baseball mitt. A lovely memento of an overall outstanding day. Despite losing, the rest of the afternoon was stellar.

I'd rank it in my top 10 weekend nights of 2005 for sure.

My first softball game is tomorrow. I have a feeling I'm going to show up sometime around the 6th inning since it's about 40 minutes from my office and the game starts at 6. I don't mind though, because it's supposed to be around the same type of weather tomorrow.

Oh shit, that reminds me, I definitely said to my partner yesterday, "I think I'm just in a good mood because I'm twitterpated." And he was like "You're what?"

"Remember in Bambi when all the skunks and birds and stuff get all happy because it's the spring? And then the wise old owl says that it's because they're twitterpated, and that's what happens in the spring?"

"Um ok, yeah I think I saw bambi like 15 years ago, though."

Sweet Christ, I hate remembering vintage Scout-nonsense the next day. I have these Monday Quarterback Reflections it seems every Sunday morning. Twitterpated. What is wrong with me. And I wonder why people think I'm nuts.

I'm going to get Haagen Daaz. That's not a threat, it's a promise.